Sunday, July 31, 2011

Using Again... All The Signs are There

Landon turned 3 on the 24th... My, how time flies. He's doing great.

I haven't seen Amanda in a few weeks. For a while she was in touch,and brought Kaylee to see me. She looked good and her outlook was positive. My biggest concern was the fact that she had taken up 100% with "boyfriend" once he got out of jail. She was doing so well without him.

Those who have seen her regularly say she is using again. Her father, who she and "boyfriend" were living with, told me of paraphernalia found, and "using behavior." When confronted by him she did not deny it. In telling me this, he asked me not to say anything to Amanda, and I didn't. However, when we met the other grandparents soon after to exchange Landon, they also expressed concerns and felt the "kids" needed to be drug-tested. I told them what was told to me.

Ah - the drama starts again... The other grandparents told them to take a drug test or give them Kaylee, or else they would call CPS. End result is that Kaylee is with her grandparents. This much is encouraging.

I am haunted by this song and the senseless tragedy of Amy Winehouse's addiction. I was also moved by this tribute from Russell Brand and what he says about addiction

Amy Winehouse - Rehab by Henrietta-Aime-Fumer_Tv


Briar said...

So sorry to hear. I don't know how mothers ever really reconcile with this. I know, RECOVERY. I'm not making excuses, I just think it goes against every law of nature to not step in and help our child. This disease forces us to do everything backward in order to stay sane.

Also, my son was not a heroin addict and every time I read about the mother of a heroin addict my heart breaks. That drug seems to take a particular stronghold over someone.


Lou said...

And so another child is left to wonder what happened to mom & dad.

I don't know..kudos to you, Dawn, the other grandparents, ALL the relatives who step up to save the kids from foster homes.

I have never met a heroin addict who could have a clean relationship with another heroin addict. Maybe there are a few, but all the ones I personally know brought each other back to the needle.

Thanks for the update. I remember when she was pregnant with Landon. How the times goes by...

Barbara said...

I can't believe he's 3 already!!!

I'm sorry to hear about the using again. Lou's comment about couples bringing each other down seems to be true. My son is dating another addict (in recovery) for the first time and I'm scared to death about it. But what can you do.

I'm glad both children are safe. Take care of yourself.

Annette said...

I am so sorry. I am glad that the babies are safe though. I know this must hurt your heart so much. I am so sorry for that.

Fractalmom said...

Dammit ! I'm here if u need me. Cell # changed. I will text it to you. <3

Tori said...

So sorry to hear that. I am glad they stepped in and took the child. It is just heart breaking.

April Martin said...

I'm so sorry. Although Logan is still in treatment and doing well we are not fooling ourselves into thinking that it could never happen again, and the chances of either Logan OR her boyfriend using again are very high ... its so scary. You thank God for the good days, the healthy ones, and just pray for his will to be done during the others. You and your family are in my thoughts.

yaya said...

Glad to see you posting again. Sorry about your daughter.

I still have guardianship of my three grandkids. Even though both bios are in recovery doesn't mean they are ready to parent.

Our littlest one just turned 3, too.

Sorry the roller coaster has started up again; dig in your heels and don't get on.

God Bless

yaya said...

Glad to see you posting again. Sorry about your daughter.

I'm parenting my daughter's three children. Our little guy just turned 3 too.

I focus all my attention on the babies, bios be damned.

God Bless

shana said...

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My name is Shana and I work for the Anderson Cooper show.I am interested in hearing more about your story. Please email me at


Cheri said...

Three!? Wow! And I am so sorry to hear about Amanda.

Our son who was in Teen Challenge has been sober for five years and recently got married (last month). But our oldest son is still abusing drugs, we just don't know to what degree. But last month at his brother's wedding and yesterday at his grandfather's funeral, we could tell he was using something. It's heartbreaking to helplessly stand by and watch them self-destruct, but they have to want to recover ... we cannot want it for them, no matter how much we want to.

You guys are in our prayers,

Mona said...

Your blog educates and somehow inspires us all to never give up on our loved ones. Addiction is indeed a difficult challenge to face head on, but I hope and pray that everything will turn out fine in the end.

smackhead said...

xperiencing it yourself breaks not just ur heart but evrything in its path